rhyheim in Rio

Of course, a celebration of my favorite Brazilian porn stars had to follow my take on American Porn Gods. Additionally, we also celebrate that all these deities are escorts.

A Forest of Brazilian Porn Stars

Italo relaxing in the sofa for Brazilian porn stars
Of course, I am not going to hide my favoritism. Clearily there is a number one amongst my current lovers: Oraixá and Super Geisha Italo Andrade.

Welcome to Brazil and to Brazilians, the people that has perfected the art of Carpe Diem. Bem vindo to the land where boundaries vanish. Bienvenido to an indefinable mix of countless ethnicities. Welcome to pansexualism, and cultural and religious syncretism.

We are not constrained anymore by monotheism. Brazil is the land of Guaraní Animism, African Yoruba, and the Christian syncretism of Umbanda. The Olympus of Brazilian Porn Stars is not a place for one god, or for trinities. Let’s embrace polytheism

First of all, because we are fond of having multiple gods and goddesses. It gives us so much more freedom and fun than One Single Measurement For Everything. Clearly, all the coolest Ancient Civilizations were polytheist.

But specially because it is the best analogy to describe the landscape of Brazilian Porn Stars. When I think of American or European Porn Gods, I imagine a temple where the number of idols is regulated, trying to limit it to One.

In contrast, when I think of Brazilian Porn Gods my imagination goes outdoors. Instead of bedrooms or any other urban landscape, I am out. Out to a magic forest inhabited by the most exquisite Spirits. 

Italo Andrade

Besides his beauty, I like his brain. As an illustration, enjoy the concept behind this tweet.

According to the myth reconstructed by recognized Pornotheologists, Olorún (others say He was actually Marcelo Mastro) descended to Earth and possessed the body of a beautiful Mediterranean man. Iemanjá, who had an old crush on the Supreme Being, adopted the form of a young Guaraní woman and seduced him. They made love all day and night long. Finally, they exploded in an orgasm celebrated by all the inhabitants of the Amazon rain forest.

The fruit of that union was one of our Brazilian Porn Stars, Italo Andrade. Of course he is much more than a porn performer. Italo’s Orixá’s powers, inherited from his Divine parents, make him the Lord of Lost in Lust.

After receiving the secret conjure to summon him, I had the pleasure of welcoming Italo into my home. Once I presented him my offerings and ritual sacrifices, Italo blessed me with an unforgettable carnal experience. Read my report, and allow me to say it one more time: he will always be one of the few I remember and long for.

If you have a computer connected to Internet, you should be watching his work, standing out amongst all Brazilian Porn Stars. Anyone living in Rio, or visiting the city, should be calling him and making a programa. Wherever in the globe you are, if you can afford it, you should be bringing Italo to you.

This blogger cannot wait for the next religious experience. This year, we are planning a Fuckgiving week in Rio.

Yuri Oberon

We almost met last July. But despite our efforts, we couldn’t.

Legend has it that Oxúm, weakened by a long drought season, was being attacked by a school of starving, aggressive Pacús. Mbói Jagua heard the noise of the fight taking place in the river. The beast swam as fast as her long body allowed her, without knowing  that the One in Need of Help was an Orixá. 

Soon she reached the waters agitated by the battle. Mbói Jagua raised her powerful head as tall as possible, and released her deafening roaring. When she fall back in the river stream, there were no traces of the ferocious Pacús. Oxúm, as a reward, made love to her savior for a whole Moon, reshaped the giant snake as a sexy young man, named it Yuri, and proclaimed him King Serpent.

Nowadays we all can enjoy Yuri and his magic snake pleasing other Spirits in Need. During my last trip to Rio I tried to summon him to my presence. Unfortunately, I probably had the wrong incantations and failed.

Hopefully, and with the help of Orixá Italo’s powers, I will be successful in a few days during my Brazilian Porn Stars Fucksgiving week.

Estevão Oliveira

History says that Orixá Estevão Oliveira, Lord Spirit of Beauty, was visiting the mortals in Rio de Janeiro. As a coincidence, God Big Bro had also descended amongst us and walked into the same train station. Although they had never met before, both immediately recognized the Divinity in each other. 

The pornspiritual wave of energy triggered by the clash of these two titans is object of study by scholars. 

In the academic circles of Theopornology is considered a fact that we are starting a new Porn Age with the arrival of God Big Bro and the Unholly Trinity. Mainstream Theopornologists recognize a before and an after Rhyheim Shabazz. However, there are no consensus on when exactly the human Rhyheim transfigured into Deity.

On this side, we have the Europeist school of Thepornology. They believe that the transformation took place somewhere in Barcelona. Probably in the restrooms of an after hour disco, or in Andy Star’s bedroom. (incidentally, Andy is Brazilian)

On the other side, the Americanist School postulates a different scenario. For these theopornologists, the transformation took place in Rio, few minutes after Estevão and Rhyheim made eyes contact for the first time. When they reached an explosive orgasm, the Paulista’s Oraixá powers turned Big Bro into Something Else.

Unfortunately, I also failed last July when I was trying Brazilian Porn Stars and summoned Estevão to my presence. Please, hold my hand and recite with me; “we will fuck this Fucksgiving”.

More Brazilian Porn Stars

Indeed, we have flocks of them. Brazil is huge, filled with hot horny men, and there is no shortage of sexpirits to populate our magic rain forest. Clearly, I owe to myself devoting more time to explore this market.

We chose our three favorite Brazilian Porn Stars, but there are many more we worship. For instance, I wonder what happened to Carlos Maranhão. He was active a few years ago, and of course also escorting. Carlos would be one of the favorite Oraixás in my little Brazilian Porn Altar, should he reappeared. 

Or what about Andy Rodrigues? We still need to know more about this Oraxá, although we can tell he looks really sexspiritually inspiring. He is just the incarnation of Perfection. I cannot compliment anything in particular without being unfair to the rest. Although I cannot resist the temptation to recommend you to pay extra attention to his dick.

There are more, many more Divine Brazilian Porn Stars: Marcelo Mastro, Kadu Castro, Max Booty, Victor Carvalho, and you can add your favorite names. Of course, let’s remember Andy Star and Alam Wernik are Brazilian.

Getting ready for Fucksgiving

I guess this is my way to killing time while I wait for my next trip to Rio. Hopefully, we will get our doses of Brazilian Porn Stars. I wish we had the money to finance the scenarios we would prefer. Because my favorite choices would not be inspired in urban landscapes.

We would be in Brazil. I imagine Orixá Italo Andrade coming out of a crystalline waterfall in the rain forest. His perfectly shaped body would be shining, his smile mesmerizing, his eyes inviting. From behind the waterfall his arms would call to hug me and melt into Something Else.

We would be in Brazil. I picture Orixá Yuri Oberon walking out of the Amazon rain forest fog. His snaky cock reaching to me, his dark eyes sinking me in lust for his devilish sexy smile. I would join him in the mist, and vanish into the jungle.

We would be in Brazil. I can see Orixá Estevão Oliveira raising over the ocean waves. His feline moves, his mouth watering smile expanding to take over the whole horizon and swallow me in a hurricane of salted water, sand, foam, and ecstasy. 

I cannot wait.

Hasta la próxima pinga, amig@s!

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