Welcome to our interview with Sean Xavier. It is not the kind of conversation you would usually have with porn stars, but the kind we will hopefully start having with them.
Sean Xavier
Although he does not need an introduction, a few readers may not know him. Let’s start with a very brief mini biography, just in case, before jumping into Sean’s interview.
Sean Xavier was born in Victorville, CA, on January 16th, 1988. His porn career started in 2011, initially performing for studios like Pride Studios, Big Daddy, and Next Door Studios, among others. In 2016, he became exclusive for Lucas Entertainment.
In 2014, he got nominations in the Grabby Awards as Hottest Top, Hottest Cock, and Best Duo. Similarly, The Cookies Awards nominated him for the 2014-2015 Best Cock & Best Porn Star Escort Award.
In 2018, Sean completed his academic Ph.D., stepped out of his career as one of the most popular gay escorts and international porn stars, and focused on his conventional occupation in Corporate America.
As everyone knows, he recently returned to escorting, offering his services in Rentmen. A month ago, he joined The Cooperative and triggered an earthquake in the Pornuniverse. If we consider that he almost immediately topped Rhyheim Shabazz, we can add a Perfect Storm to the quake.
The Interview
Unlike others we published, this interview with Sean Xavier is not a conversation. We sent nine questions, and the megastar responded to 8 of them. You will see how generous, thoughtful, intimate, and thorough his responses are.
This blogger will not share the question that remains unanswered. However, we will share that it was the only one with the potential to cause conflict and controversy. It illustrates one of the takeaways from Sean’s interview: his focus is Love. He is not interested in negativity.
We do not have original images as we did not meet for this interview. This post’s featured photo comes from a Photoshoot in Malibú by EyeFilmz. As always in our blog, all other images are linked to their source.
Let’s start.
You shared before that your adult entertainment work has always been a means to an end. I would assume that your previous retirements (isn’t this your third comeback?) had to do with meeting those goals. Would you share what those goals were?
It’s important to note that I invested a lot of time into academia and the pursuit of Design. I truly believe in the power of Design (as a service profession) to understand the needs and wants of an end user and create beautiful, usable, delightful things for them. Further, Design, when practiced at the policy, political, economic, and societal change level, has the potential to do an enormous amount of good (and lots of harm). It was fulfilling for me to be in a career that wrestled with those types of challenges. So, in some respects, there was a lot of forward momentum – since high school – to work hard, get the degree, move into the field, and change the world. I had the pleasure and opportunity to work on some pretty incredible projects in the Machine Learning and Artificial Intelligence space on financial well-being and data/privacy ethics.
Stepping back from FinTech isn’t so much about meeting goals as it was a deeper realization about how much I also enjoy the adult entertainment work. With the rise of creator-owned content sharing platforms, financially, it’s also a viable career path.
Now it is different, and you see that adult entertainment has value. What has changed?
Mental health has a lot to do with it. About two years ago, I started suffering from unexplained seizures. They were seemingly manic episodes where I believed I had transcended time and space, achieved Nirvana, and was God incarnate Himself. Recognizing that this isn’t ‘normal’ behavior, I worked with my therapists, psychiatrists, neurologists, an entire medical team, really, to identify the source of the delusions. In the treatment process, we used Ketamine for treatment-resistant depression, and it had a pretty life-changing effect. So many layers of childhood trauma made manifest in adult anxieties began to unravel, as I gained a new appreciation and purpose for life: Namely, to love God and love others.
I shared with my parents that I was stepping back into adult work, and my dad said to me: “son” (he has James Earl Jones’ Mufasa voice when he’s giving advice). He said, “son, don’t let the value you place in your work be greater than the value you place in your worship.” My dad is an exceptionally thoughtful man, and he knew how to encapsulate such wisdom without couching it in judgment. I love him.
Two days later, I met a gentleman; as we moved to the bedroom, I could tell he was nervous, but differently than first-time-hirer jitters. He was intent on having me get into a receptive position face-down before him taking off any clothes. I stopped him and asked what the awkwardness was, and he went on to explain how he was a victim of genital mutilation in his home country as a young man. They had sliced his dick in half. He had long since healed, but it left him pretty malformed down there.
As I stripped him down and examined his member, it was definitely unique – the surgical skin grafting had left it shaped more like a rectangular prism than a cylindrical shaft. But my dad’s words were in the forefront of my mind, and here, as I held his dick in my hand, was a man that, for much of his adult life, has walked with shame and embarrassment because he was victimized – both physically and mentally – by people that wouldn’t love him for who he is. And, here I am, in a position to see, feel, touch this man with Love – touch him sexually, lovingly – and to help him see that he is beautiful, and gifted, and wonderful, and deserving of Love. It was an intense, surreal moment.
Might I say, the sex was phenomenal too, some of the better sex I’ve ever had, to be honest, because the shape of his dick was hitting in ways I had never felt before. I’d definitely recommend it.
After the more physical part of our encounter, as we were laying together, I felt the strong unction to ask if I might pray for him. I can only say that God was with us at that moment. As I shared what I felt compelled to say about his worth, purpose, power, and life, we both began crying – wailing, really – in each other’s arms. It was beautiful. He later shared with me that his father had passed just a few weeks prior, and he had been in a pretty dark place mentally. That moment, that experience, really changed me. I felt solace in what I was doing in adult entertainment work that I had never felt before. If anything, I was energized to do it more heartfully because I see its potential as a vehicle for spreading a message of Love.
You returned to escorting first. When you did, had you already decided to come back to the Porn Industry?
The escorting came first because it’s the easiest engine to turn back on. One button, and my ad is back online. Porn came after meeting Rhyheim and seeing his operation.
Did you choose to come back with Rhyheim Shabazz’s collaborative team, or did they choose you?
Rhyheim found me, and it took one phone call for us to know we wanted to work together.
How do you compare your previous experience working for porn studios with your current journey collaborating with independent creators?
It’s the same work but a different cast and crew. In studio work, the director and the other model are your primary persons of focus. In studios, each is focused on a much narrow job scope – fucking, and getting the right angles while fucking. With independent collaborations, your scene partner is also the director, the photographer, the lighting and sound tech, the video editor, the marketing director, the booking agent, and the runner. As are you, yourself. So, there’s a lot more in your head at one time when you’re filming a scene with another independent creator than when you’re filming on set.
You strike me as someone with an exceptional understanding of sensuality and sex. What are the circumstances in your life experience that fostered this talent?
I enjoy making people feel good. I get turned on, turning someone else on. I’m not sure that it was specific life experiences that I can cite; it’s more a general ethos of putting others before yourself, listening and learning, and being open to others’ way of being. In bed, that translates to being attentive to how you touch your partner, responding to their moans and movements, being curious about how they enjoy being touched, and being receptive to pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone to try and find ways to please.
You have found a way to integrate your adult entertainment and conventional careers. Would you elaborate on the relationship between porn/sex work, academy, and Corporate America?
The common thread between all three is that I like to serve, and I like to give. Design is a service industry focused on creating solutions that help solve the problems of others; teaching is helping others to realize their potential, and sex work is the definition of servicing others to maximize their pleasure. In Design, I give my advice, acumen, and perspective and dedicate my skill set to solving problems; in teaching, I give the wisdom of my life experience; and in sex, I give… myself.
You are a planner. What is the plan?
I’m returning to the industry with a business partner. Expect to see and HEAR more of him very soon. The plan is to continue honing my message and refining the content I want to showcase. I do believe my style and the type of work you’ll be seeing from me will center in a space that tries to promote self-love and Love to others. I see that work expanding to include live shows and greater engagement with the audience of the work so that we can talk more candidly about sex and the fantasy of sex. I see the creation of really, really beautiful things with really, really beautiful people. I’m excited for it.
JOY AND LOVE
When I read the email with his answers, I felt overcome by Joy and Love. The joy mainly came from a feeling of reaffirmation, from sharing basic understandings with someone you admire. Joy also came from my silent celebration of Sex as a Force to explore, love, and respect instead of as a Danger to explain, fear, and control. There is always an inside-of-me party when I find a like-minded spirit.
The Love came from gratitude and empathy. Sean’s interview is full of generous sharing of personal experiences and challenges.
I hope you liked this Interview with Sean Xavier. I liked it a lot.
You will find access to Sean’s outlets in this single link.
Hasta la próxima pinga, amig@s!
